Separation is never a process that couples should rush into. It needs to be something that they spend time carefully thinking about. Separation is not always the best option for struggling marriages. But sometimes, there is nothing else that can be done. Separation can provide couples with a much needed break to evaluate the marriage. There are three main reasons why separation might be the best option.
Abusive Spouse
The first scenario where separation might make sense is in an abusive situation. When one spouse begins to seriously threaten the safety of the home, it is time to make a break. The spouse who is the victim has a responsibility to themselves and anyone else in danger to separate and get away from the abusive spouse. Some might try to wait out the danger and hope that it will end. But this is never the right course of action. Most likely, the abusive spouse will continue down that path, and staying will only make it worse for everyone. By getting away from the situation, you are protecting yourself and your children from being placed in harm’s way and allowing for the proper authorities to bring help.
Continuing Bad Habits
Another reason that couples should decide to separate is if one spouse has a history of continuing behaviors that break down the marriage. These can be anything from addiction to infidelity. The marriage can only survive if couples work together to combat any issues they are facing. If one spouse who is suffering from habitual problems refuses to correct them, a break might be in order. The other spouse being affected can do nothing but sit at the sidelines and watch. That is not fair to them and it is not fair to anyone else involved either. Spouses will know that it is time to separate if the spouse who is committing the behavior is not showing any signs of stopping or even wanting to stop.
Separating as Therapy
Sometimes couples will separate as a way to work through any marital issues. While separation is never something to step into lightly, couples who choose to go this route – especially for therapeutic reasons – need to think about it very carefully. Couples who separate for these reasons may not be seeking to divorce, but their marriage might not be working out in the way that it once did. The goal of separation would be temporary with the hope of reconciling. During this time, they need to evaluate where both stand on the marriage and attend counseling together. This way they can determine if the marriage can still work. If not they know that it is time to divorce.
Separation for any reason should be thought about very carefully before couples split. All couples who are seeking this route should not take it lightly. If you or someone you know is thinking about separating, contact Christine Howard today. Christine or anyone on her team would be more than happy to answer any questions you may have about the separation process. She can be reached at info@christinehoward.com or by phone at (864) 282-8575.
Referenced from “Things to Consider Before You Separate” by Focus on the Family.